Wednesday 3 July 2013

6 Reasons Why Men Refuse to Commit

There have been a lot of men commitment issues today because of fear. Fear of commitment is a combination of the following fears: fear of compromise, money issues, lack of freedom and privacy. Nonetheless, there can be a lot of justification when men faces commitment issues, but whatever justifications to give, the reality tells us that all women involving in a relationship should have a certain requirement and obligation to know if the person is ready for a commitment or not. This is very helpful for women to be very alert with things that surround them especially their boyfriend who may be involved with such commitment issue; this is an awareness. So, what now? do men have more commitment issues than women? Out of 10 guys that you can possibly date, 8 guys can have a fear of commitment.

 One of the scary things that can ever happen in your life is to fall deeply in love with the wrong person.If heartbreak is painful, so as love without commitment.

Although you are facing with such dilemma, it is important to note those men commitment issues that hinder them to bravely face the relationship until the end.

Unable to date more than 1 woman – It is part of men's nature to desire dating more than 1 woman. Therefore, when commitment is part of the relationship a man decides to enter, dating moments with multiples girls is such a NO!Of course, it is necessary to be a one woman man. For men, especially the cowardly, commitment really scare them because they feel they are just kept controlled in the relationship; and that they feel they are stopped to go and date many girls.

They fear unpleasant things in the relationship
– This is common among men during a break from work where some co-workers tell them about their complaints of their married life, or their friends during a night out who also have the same complaint that they are made to follow certain standards in marriage/relationship. What they also get is those ugly moments in the relationship added the fact that their lives have to be adjusted and changes and added responsibility.So what happens is that men opt to stay in a dating relationship as in without strings attached. Money problems – Since men are very ego centered type of person, they always see to it that they are stable financially to be able to give the needs of the partner and the family.Men is considered a provider, and when they are into a lifetime committed relationship, they anticipate the fact that a responsibility is placed on them to provide financially. So if the man believes that his work is still starting and he is still financially unstable, commitment is not a top priority at this time. Dependent – One thing that men think about commitment is the idea of being completely independent in terms of deciding and solving problems.But, most men are dependent in such a way that when they are reared with very supportive parents, they generally feel so secured that whatever they do and when it fails, their parents will be there to support them. When they will commit into a certain relationship, they feel as though they will be changed as a whole which is why they disregard saying I LOVE YOU or WILL YOU MARRY ME?

Promises are meant to be broken
- There are women who believe that their men are honest when they say they want to be in a committed relationship, and somewhere in the relationship men change and decide that a fully committed relationship is not for them; frustration, hurt and depression happen in women.

Past bad experiences
– When a man has emotional damage, it is highly related to faulty family relationship and bad experiences in the relationship.It is actually difficult for a man when he had bad experiences before as trust was also crashed, thus commitment is a process to really take time before trying.

It is for every women’s perspective on how they can solve the problem and get through with men commitment issues, and it is also for every men’s perspective on whether to commit or not. However, the issues are not just meant to be solved but also to realize the need for responsibility, independence, maturity, firmness and stability. So when men know that they are not responsible enough, it's time to become one; and when they know they are unprepared to become independent, it's time to decide on simple things.Sometimes, the truth is telling us that we cannot learn to take control in our lives if we will not ourselves to be one.Remember, nothing beats the beauty of the relationship as you can be forever happy with someone you believe you are destined to be forever. 

Is Marriage A Karmic Contract Or A Soulmate Relationship

 Are Marriages really made in heaven? If that was the case, why so many failed marriages around us, why the entire discontentment, the lack of trust, the stress, the unspoken sadness around us?

I am no authority on this aspect but I would like to present my perspective on marriage. It may resonate with some and it may not with others but I believe having seen and experienced both sides of the coin, I understand this union at a much deeper level.

 Marriage is a sacred contract between two souls who decide to make their journey together by the way of living with each other, being with each other in the closest way possible in mind, body and soul. Having said that, there is no one who can say if the relationship was only meant to be till that relationship surfaces karmic patterns or life situations or understandings about one’s own self or it was meant to be a lifetime of togetherness. For that matter, each relationship is karmic. There is a reason for why two souls get attracted to each other and form any relationship. The difference between any other relationship based on love and marriage is the “commitment”.

Based on my understanding of the sub-conscious mind & the karmic patterns, somewhere when a soul decides to experience a karmic relationship with another soul by way of marriage, there are deep emotions of “commitment” and “responsibility” that are inevitably going to be a part of the lessons. Any other relationship can be opted out the moment a person fails to experience love in it but marriage, especially in the background of the Indian Culture is a bond that experiences much resistance if one decides to walk out.

So how does one decide what is the best thing to do. To stay or to leave?

Each relationship brings about negative emotions that overshadows the love that was the base of it primarily because there are negative emotions in our own soul that were stuck and that respective relationship is causing them to surface. The first and foremost thing to do is to remember that each of that negativity is not to be submitted to or judged but it is an emotion that wants to leave.

These emotions that one could experience with their spouse including lack of trust, lack of love, hurt, pain, sadness, suffering, abuse etc are actually stored in the one who is experiencing them where the spouse is only becoming a medium for the conscious mind to register them. It is possible that these emotions were consciously created in this lifetime during the phase of the relationship or at times it’s possible there is no logical root to them from this life. In that case, most certainly the roots will lie in past lives where certain emotions were created either with regards to the concept of marriage or that particular soul who is the spouse or both.

For the soul, a marriage is another way to experience a close bond. The soul has married so many times with different mates over lifetimes and the sanctity we hold in our consciousness for marriage, our souls may not completely resonate with them. At the same time, there is a reason why the soul being fully aware of the commitment that is expected of marriage in human form in a particular birth will choose to experience it with another soul. The very definite idea is to resolve karmic issues with the other soul and reach a state of unconditional love. Once that state is achieved, it will depend on the further lessons and journey of both the souls in question as to if their relationship is meant to move together in that life or they have their own paths charted out with other soulmates.


The idea is not to lower the importance or sanctity of a marriage but it is about realizing that like each relationship is different and on the soul level it’s meant for our growth, each marriage is also different and it carries its own destiny.

In all cases, staying in the marriage and resolving the differences to the extent where there is no backlog, no history, no negativity experienced between the two souls is a must for a resolution to come. If it’s not possible to do while staying together, it can be done by staying away but forgiveness between the two souls is imperative for their growth. Post that, if what is left is love, they may decide to spend the rest of their lives together or lees they will find their own journeys in their highest good.

Ultimately, my understanding is, there is no point judging ourselves or staying in a marriage for any other reason but love. All other reasons are karmic and they must be resolved. If one sacrifices in the name of any relationship, it is like agreeing to punish one’s own soul in order to save others which means one creates karma with one’s own soul which also at some point will need to be dealt with. Our children maybe young bodies but are stronger souls many times than us and they also choose to experience difficult childhoods and challenges for they want to grow through them.

In such cases, accepting the state of the marriage and actively using New Age Therapies to resolve the deep seated emotions will make sense to get closer to and be guided by one’s sub-conscious mind and hence move towards peace and happiness. Finally, it’s all about transforming us into better and more compassionate individuals. Finally, it’s again about staying in love and light!

How to Deal With Post Marriage Settlements

Marriage is one of the biggest and most significant changes in a person’s life. It is amazing how two people from absolutely different backgrounds decide to spend the rest of their lives together. It is important to understand that marriage brings in a lot of responsibilities and also changes that you may have never experienced before.

The most important thing to deal with post marriage are in laws. One must understand that your partner expects you to give his/her parents the same respect and care that they give. It is therefore important to respect the expectations of your partner. Appreciate that you would also want your partner to treat your parents with the same love and respect and therefore your partner’s expectations are not unjustified. The right approach • Sharing good relations with your in laws and other relatives and friends of your partner only strengthens the bond between you and your partner. This is also not very difficult to achieve. Spend time with your partner’s parents and show care and respect. They will appreciate you for your efforts and shower you with love and care in return. This only strengthens your partner’s confidence in you.

Some tips...

 • It is equally important to gel well with your partner’s friends. This also gives you an opportunity to spend more time with your partner since he/she does not have to go meet his/her friends without you merely because you don’t know them or don’t get along well with them. If you have common friends then you could hang out together and also avoid a situation where you realise that you are overgrowing each other. The more your relationship shares common links the stronger and enjoyable it gets.

 • There are ways by which you could try and establish a good rapport with your in-laws. Try and go out with your in-laws when your partner is not around. They’ll appreciate that you take care of them even in the absence of your partner. You can also call them over for lunch or dinner more often. If you spend time with your partner’s friends and parents you get to understand your partner better. In case of any misunderstandings, friends and parents can intervene to have things sorted out, and sometimes in relationships this kind of support is extremely important. So do not shy away from meeting your partner’s friends and parents. Remember it will only make your post-marriage settlement easier and happier.

Pre-Marriage Confusions And Questions - Don't Worry Its Natural

Most couples are confused, dazzled and worried before marriage. This is a common anxiety because a wise man has said that ‘Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener’. The usual way is that we meet someone, fall in love and eventually tie knot. But there are couples that are not sure about their decision as they do not find enough time to know their partner.

Be Prepared for the Commitment of Lifetime

 Marriage is a big commitment and you want to make sure that you are with the right person. Whether you are entering into a long term intimate relationship or sealing it legally, it is best to know the person with whom you will spend rest of your life. For a successful marriage, you need to work on this relationship. Many people have many questions before marriage so you can ask these questions or find out themselves through other ways. In this way you will get to know your potential partners. Clear your Pre-marriage Questions Every couple that is going to get married should have list of pre-marriage questions to keep their relationship get going. Everybody wants to have a happy married life and you can get few things cleared before taking the plunge. Compromises are natural in marriage but you should know to accept them. Therefore you should discuss all topics right from the onset of your relationship to make it is displeasure later in marriage.

Love is not the Only Reason!

Do not be passive but give it your best because chances are there that your relationship will flourish organically. Every marriage has it own peaks and valleys but settling some of the major issues saves you from consequential heartburns and insolvable issues. You should ascertain whether two of you are like-minded individuals. Sometimes love is not just enough to keep a couple altogether. This is because some couples forget to ask some vital questions.

Look Marriage from Various Perspectives

First thing to consider is to know the reason behind marriage. Many couples really know why they are getting married? Marriage is not the solution for every problem so you should look it from a different perspective and take your decision accordingly. This will help you to know if you are on the same wavelength.

Your Compatibility as a Couple

Then what is your compatibility as a couple? Before getting married, couples should know each other. A compromise is fine in relationship but this should not happen always. Many couples have unexpected fear due to which they commit some unwanted blunders. The best part of the wedding happens after guests go home and you slip out of your fancy dress. The first night of marriage should be special because you both want to be all alone but do not overburden it with too much of expectations.

Keep the Responsibilities in Mind

Love can make you overlook about certain issues which is important after marriage. Marriage means a lot of responsibilities and this should mean that couples should be prepared for it. Therefore you should discuss about these responsibilities before getting married. Most couples have a steady relationship before marriage but post marriage things are different. It is important to sort out these things and both of you need to specify your role post marriage. This would help to get a clear picture. Keeping all these things in mind would help you make your marriage successful.

Lifestyle, Testosterone and Marriage- What is the Relationship Between Them

So you’re well into your forties, and have realized that sexual activity isn’t as interesting as it used to be? Is a lack of sexual interest taking a toll on your relationship? This is a very common problem faced by millions of men, who find that physical intimacy isn’t as sizzling as it was before. This feeling of disinterest is often attributed to depression and is one of the major reasons why couples head for a split. The real answer is male menopause, a condition better known as testosterone deficiency, or simply put, and declining amount of testosterone in the blood.

Testosterone, the principal male hormone plays a crucial role in the body, greatly impacting a man’s libido, metabolism, weight, and mood. Its production peaks during puberty, but gradually declines as a man grows older. This change is barely perceptible to some men because their system adapts to this hormonal imbalance without much trouble. But it can deal a hard blow to some, making them gain weight, lose interest in sexual activity and reduce their zest for life. The good news is low testosterone is manageable, and so all those men (and women) who want to revive their relationship, take a quick look at how to deal with low T and save your marriage!

Ways to Overcome Low T and Save your Relationship

·Make you you’re eating the right foods. That means including fresh vegetables and fruits in your diet and eating whole grains instead of processed foods. You need to increase your testosterone, so a bit of meat such as beef liver or chicken will do you good. But go easy on animal products containing large amounts of saturated or trans fats, and this includes junk food as well. Such foods make you lethargic and are bad for heart health as well.

· Look for nutritional supplements that raise testosterone. A good example is from reviews of Ageless Male supplement. It replenishes the amount of available testosterone in the body, helping men fight signs of aging such as sluggishness, low libido, flabby muscles, and poor metabolism. Ageless Male testimonials are ample proof that this supplement boosts sex drive and testosterone levels and gives outstanding results.

· Join a gym! Yes, exercising has a profound impact on your hormonal levels and greatly influences sex drive. Strength training and resistance training are the best forms of exercises that’ll hike your T levels. Ladies, motivate your man to work out daily, be it any kind of exercise! It’ll also help your guy shed a few pounds and shrug away the sluggishness.

· Beat the stress. Stress can completely ruin a relationship by sinking your sexual desire. Find ways to combat stress. Get a good night’s sleep. Meditate, do yoga, surround yourself with your loved ones.

You don’t have to wait for testosterone to decline to start following the steps listed above. No matter what age you are, commit to a healthy lifestyle by making smart dietary choices and abiding by a fitness program that’ll keep your testosterone levels in a favorable range; so you don’t have to bother about testosterone deficiency ruining your marriage, or relationship!

Palmistry and Marriage- Understanding the Marriage Line in Your Palm

The science of palm reading not only predicts the married life of a person but also everything that is relating to human life. The marriage line on the palm is the passport that helps to know as to the married life of a human being. The only line of marriage can forecast if there is divorce or dispute between the partners. The marriage line needs to be clean, long and good looking on the palm to have good marital life. Generally the line of marriage is present just below the little finger on the mount of moon. Though it is an important line in the study of palmistry, yet it is very small in its appearance in comparison to other lines on the palm. The line of marriage should be present on the mount of Mercury without any breaks, islands and cross etc. The neat and clean marriage line indicates a healthy married life.

There are different kinds of variation of the line of marriage. If the line of marriage crosses the line of heart on the palm and moves towards the mounts of Venus then it is an indication of unhappy married life. It indicates that the married life will end in separation. The spot on the marriage line denotes that the conjugal life will be unhappy. If there be an island then it will bring ill heath to the life of opposite partner. If the line of marriage touches the heart line then it is a sure indication of the death of the life partner. If the line of marriage moves upwards towards the little finger then it will predict that the person will remain unmarried throughout life. If the line of marriage touched the line of Sun then it is an indication of a marriage with a reputed and wealthy person. The person with a good Sun line also indicates that the person will get married with a reputed person. The marriage line should be studied carefully while doing reading as to the marriage.

The only marriage line is not enough to come to the conclusion for a successful conjugal life. That is why; it is advised to study line of the heart on the palm while doing palmistry reading. The heart line needs to be very clean and long to reciprocate a great love. The line heart line that touches mount of Jupiter indicates a sympathetic and lovable person. The marriage line must be clean and long for a good married life. It is better to calculate the horoscope of a person to get more accurate result as to the married life of a person. The lord of marriage should be free from affliction in the birth chart and the line of marriage needs to be strong enough on the palm in order to lead a happy married life. If the 7th house in the birth chart is afflicted by the malefic planets and at the same time the marriage line is not up to the mark then married life will be on the crossroad.

Arya Samaj Mandir - Redifining Hindu Marriage

Marriage is considered the holy union of two people in which not only two individuals unite in a lifelong relation but the two families be a part of each other’s life. The sacred union is of great importance in the country like India where moral values are still above other things. Marriage is always a big day of everyone’s life but a middle-class family sometimes losses a major portion of their earning just to show the world the grand arrangements of the big fat wedding. Despite all the odds and show off associated in the Indian weddings, Arya samaj marriage has seen huge applauds for promoting the simple marriage ceremony. Simplicity is the main mantra of this organization which was founded by Swami Dayanand in the year 1875 who believed the ideals of chastity.

The founder of the samaj, as stated earlier, was a firm believer of the rights of equality and wished to provide the women of society the same place where the male generation was standing. While opposing the Brahmanism, he emphasized the rights of equality and stated that the priestly rituals are the main reason behind the corruption of the knowledge of the Vedas. He also believed that Vedas are not the religious things to be used or applied by a particular group of the society but are the heritage of all.

Arya samaj mandir marriage is based on the same rituals as that of Hindu marriage but the rituals are recited from the Vedas. These people believe in the fact that marriage should be celebrated as the special bond of love and is not a platform to show the world what money you have and what status you hold in the society. Caste, creed and religion are things of no existence for these people and they want to make the marriage a memory to be cherished for lifetime. The followers also don’t believe in the long rituals and extravagant affairs for the sake of tradition and society. The marriage is solemnized in the special Arya Samaj Mandirs wehre the bride and groom have to be available on the big day with all their documents as asked by the authorized person for their identification. The couples are also handed over the marriage certificate after solemnizing the marriage.

Child and forceful marriages are opposed by the Arya Samaj Organization and due to their odd activities as forced by the orthodox society it gained popularity in the late nineteenth century and became the reason of the Hindu Renaissance. The society has seen major changes in the recent times due to the effortless activities of the Organization.

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